I am quite amazed at the brutally honest heartfelt expressions I just heard from you about your life's journey. I have focused in on you little by little and listening to you just now has touched my heart. That doesn't happen too often as I am very protective of my self. You have earned all the accolades I have read from the Bixters and it is obvious you have touched their hearts as well. There are many joys and sorrows in this journey of life and you have already experienced quite a few. You are certainly a gifted singer and not just another pretty face :). Your style is different than what I am accustomed to but your delivery (can't stand still - music moves you nicely)and the richnous of your voice and smile have won me over. I am sorry to hear about the loss of your loved ones and I pray that God continues to give you and your sister peace of mind. Congratulations on your impending marriage. The man you are marrying is getting quite a package and is very lucky to say the least. Good luck on your new Ark Angel venture. May God bless you and keep you in his care. 04/23/2008 07:48
I decided tonight… since I can't sleep anyway.. to go through all ur entries and I cried watching this one… not because u talked about Mom & Kris but because it really made me realize just how much I truely do miss u!!! I better get to be in the wedding party when y'all get married… have u started planning yet? where are ya gonna get married? When? Why haven't we talked about this on the phone? lol I love ya sis… and more than anything, and this may sound kinda silly comming from ur baby sister but, I'm SOOOOOOOO proud of u!!! 02/03/2008 02:19
Stephanie,First let me congratulate you on your engagement, you Fiancee is a lucky man. So good luck in your new life. don't know why I got so far back on your page and found this but i did and I am glad I got to listen. This was a very revealing look inside your life and I honor you very much for being able to open up and share your soul. I won't begin to say that I know what you feel beause "Suicide" has never entered my life in any way, so no I don't know how you feel, but I feel your hurt. What is amazing to me about the tragedy in your life, is the way you spoke about it. So many times when suicide has come into someone's life, they become judgemental and resentful toward that person who has chosen to end thier being. I think the only thing that keeps us all from that moment when we say enough is enough, is the "Inner Strength" that each of us has. Everyone has a different breaking point and most of us do not know what that point is but we all deal with things different and we all have our own way of saying "NO" I won't let this get the best of me. It is sad that you are left with the everyday thought of what has happened and I feel for you, I am also sad for your mother because her choosing death due to your brother rather than life with her beautiful and Caring daughter is what suprises me, but again who can know what goes on in a person's mind? I am happy for you that you have the strength to take your tragedies and use them to become stronger and that is what I hear as I listened to you talk, I didn't like hearing about your tragedy, and I didn't like seeing your pain but I am so happy to see that you could release your pain in such a humbling way. Listening to you should make everyone as it did me, to look at themselves and see all the blessings we have and all that we take for granted. Life is precious,Life is short, but life is for living and as you said to make the most and happiest that it can be.
Stephanie, you are a talented lady, Music, No music, in any form you are talented but I see as a person you are unselfish and caring and so humble. Those are qualities we all wish we had. So even though I don't know you, I do know you and all your words were thought provoking. I am a quiet person when it comes to me, my inside is usually kept to me no matter what. May God bless you and your new life and I hope you receive all that this world has for you and more because I don't think you expect anything (And that is HUMILITY to it highest definition) you are a great lady. 01/11/2008 10:50
I just watched this again, because I have come to know you better. You are such a precious, genuine young lady. The fact that you are talented goes without saying. However, you have a delightful sense of humor, you have such a warm and open heart. You truly do deserve to be loved and have someone to love.As I have come to know you better I am so amazed at your humor and wit. I can tell that you are very very intelligent. Too bad both my sons are married, I would make you my daughter-in-law in a heart beat. I'd just tell one of my sons, "Here, marry this girl, I like her!" Do you think that would have worked?Anyway, it is certainly no surprise why you won the first place in the very peculiar competition.There is so much plastic in the world, so much we have to question, so much we cannot trust. To hear someone such as yourself speak with such eloquence, without any veils or shrouds to protect yourself. You opened your heart, and basically said "Here I am, here's where I've been, here's where I'm at, and why, and here's where I'd like to be." It was so genuine and real, that I think it touched the heart of everyone that heard you speak.You opened your heart, and when you did, many new friends came rushing in. God Bless you Sweetie. 12/29/2007 00:35
Oh Doc:) if there were a father-in-law i could pick.. it would be you:) so sincerely:) I have been so blessed by finding Bix.. and by being found by so many amazing people here. It's true.. new friends did rush into my open heart.. and at a time when i couldn't have needed it more. I feel honoured that you understand my 'realness'... some people doubt it, maybe because there is so much in the world we can't trust. or because i am a peculiar girl sometimes:P (yes, i noticed how you changed the contest from 'very original' to 'very peculiar:P ) I love you, Doc. thank you so much, i'm a grateful child. StephXX 01/02/2008 07:59
Wow! Well first let me congradulate you on you your engagement! I'm really impressed with your ability to express yourself. You show a fearlessness in showing vulnerablity that's quite charming. I'm sorry for the losses of your brother and mom. I know it's hard, but you're fighting to not let grief and pain define your outlook and that's some good, difficult work that is paying off, it shows! Keep it up! =^) I believe you are a natural singer and a closet super star! ;^) The ability to communicate emotionally is crucial to being a great entertainer and you've got it! It can be really painful to sort of relive the emotions that go into singing a song that has alot of meaning to you, whether you wrote it or someone else did, the feelings brought out by singing are very powerful. It's a challenge to summon the courage to face those feelings again and again, but music has a profound way of making it easier to deal with. A world without music would be a living hell.
Your tender rendition of Ane Brun is inspiring to us all and a reminder that music is a great and powerful healer, emotions are something in life that must be experienced and worked though before they can be understood and resolved. I see you as a kindred spirit and I'm sorry I put off entering this, for lack of a better term, "contest" 'til it was too late! (I actually tried to create an entry twice but just couldn't get it out right and kept putting it off.) I think you're a pretty cool person! Thank you for, well, being you! 12/28/2007 20:10
Wow.. what an amazing comment. thank you so much for such a sincere response to this entry:) A world without music would be a living hell. Singing has always been my safe place;) where everything seems right in the world, like i'm doing what i'm supposed to do and all the usual 'floundering around' i do in my day to day slips off;). It was a difficult entry to do.. but it's interesting how it turned out once i stopped trying to present myself in a certain way.. and just presented myself. Again, thanks so much for your comments:) you made me feel very good:) StephXX 01/02/2008 07:50
You ARE a survivor..first you might been afraid, you might have been petrified, thinking you couldn't live without someone by your side..then you realized that you should have changed that lock...I think the locksmith has come and done that so throw away that old key...the only thing old keys are good for is to super glue them to a picture frame...that way you can see the many doors you've come through and those doors that you've shut for good, knowing the key in your hand is to the door to your future. You ARE a survivor! 12/18/2007 16:42
Hello Torch:) Happy New Year to you.. i'm sorry i'm so long in responding. Thank you so much for your words here:) i understand 'key' talk well.. so really, thank you:) take good care, StephXX 01/02/2008 07:34
I enjoyed this, it's nice to meet someone with an outlook like yours...wise and mature. Complete opposite of my video. You sang beautifully! Congrats on the upcoming wedding and I think I will Keep on Trucking, I've got a lot more video's to check out...see ya around. 11/21/2007 23:40
Muuuaaahahahaha... my wise/mature thing ?..... it's all an act :P Glad you liked the vid and the voice ;).... take good care and thanks! 11/23/2007 07:24
You may have been through alot and it surely has affected who you are, However, you seem to speak and sing with an air of confidence… You have a beautifully unique voice !! I hope all goes well for you in the future !! 11/11/2007 20:27
Thank you very much, Visions. I've got the 'act' confident thing down pat ;) .. you know, live it until you believe it, kind of thing... slowly working too;) Thanks for such a great compliment about my voice. And your 'well wishes' for my future are always appreciated ;) ... i think all of us need all the hopes and wishes we can get... so thanks again. -Stephanie 11/12/2007 16:10
Very beautiful and touching Stephanie,thank you for sharing your story with us. I know I can relate to some of the things you mentioned and I am so happy for you that you are using these things in your life to make you stronger. What an inspirational attitude you have. Thanks again for your candid story! 11/10/2007 10:55
Well, thanks very much for stopping to listen :) I think a lot of people can relate to some of it... and thanks for being happy for me. Your comment made me feel very good. ty :D 11/10/2007 16:20
What a wonderful heartfelt and candid talk. You certainly have been through a lot. All that you can hope for is that these tragedies you have endured make your heart and your soul yearn even more for all that is good in life. God Bless You! 11/08/2007 02:14
Thank you so much... i actually feel blessed, fairly often, in all my travels... the Life that has been so hard for so many, to the point of being unbearable for some, has always risen to keep me afloat. Like somehow when everything seems about to pull at the seams... something stitches me tighter. someone always turns up at the last minute to help, or my inner resolve is made clear to me, and i move on. I've always had Faith.. in what.. i've not always been sure.. but i've had Faith. ... and so far, :P that's working for me. ty again for commenting... and i take all the blessing i can get ;) 11/09/2007 19:36
TY for the revealing look into you Stephanie. Very interesting, open, and honest. Are you the next Shania.Sorry for your trajic losses.
Boo 10/30/2007 12:23
I'm glad you are happy and making yourself feeling better! Keep your chin up!!! And I also know alot about being in a shell. I just recently discovered bix.com last week and I love to sing too.
Congradulations on your engagement. 10/24/2007 13:14
Stephanie, you are a very strong woman… your loss has been great… your spirt shows just how beautiful and strong a person you've become. Thank you so much for sharing so honestly and truly you are so cool!!! and congrads on the marriage!! 10/23/2007 20:58
Aww.. ty so much, James. It's the funniest thing about being a 'strong person' ... sometimes i feel like a fragile wounded soldier but somehow am driven to keep heading for the 'front line'. Strength coming from places i dare not take credit for ;) ...i'm either pushed on by God .. or i am the hardest headed woman i know ;).. for now i think it's a bit of both. ty so much for your comments. 10/28/2007 20:01
Great way to just dive right in here, Stephanie!! You obviously have no problem adapting to new places having moved around so much (I did too!)...So very sorry to hear about your brother and your mother...It's so hard to lose loved ones but especially in such a tragic way...You have such a great outlook in spite of having lived through so many personal tragedies...You are a strong woman and an inspiration...Perfect song choice and I love your voice...Welcome to Bix, Stephanie...You will always be able to find a friendly face/voice here whenever you are feeling down. And when all else fails....just sing!! Oh, cool...just heard the happy news! Congrats on your engagement!! You keep on truckin' too!! 10/17/2007 20:39
Oh Lisa, thank you so much. I have no choice but to 'dive in' usually... or i jam out :P But this community has been so sincerely supportive and fun and .. well, i'm just glad to have found it. Folks like yourself, kind and really talented, are a pleasure to get to know. I'm kinda smart in that i show off my 'bravery' with people worthy of the trust ;) Thanks, sincerely, for being part of it. 10/20/2007 17:40
Hi Stephanie! Thanks so much for sharing with us. Big and brave, I think you already are :):) I enjoyed listening to you very much. I don't think life ever settles but I guess that's a good thing too :):).... Desolee d'apprendre pour ton frere ainsi que ta mere. Meme dans le malheur on puise de l'energie tres positive...( curieux, je l'admets) et ca ,je crois que tu as su le reconnaitre! Hope you're having a great day! :) 10/17/2007 15:30
Thank you for that. I agree that life never settling is part of what makes it ... well, alive :D and it's true about being able to be higher than your low times... it's surprising when it happens... but we're so grateful when it does ;) thanks for the well wishes. 10/17/2007 19:58
thanks very much for listening :) your condolences.. and in fact the condolences i am receiving from so many kind people here on Bix, really mean a lot. i'm also thrilled you like my voice ;) ty so much. 10/16/2007 16:21
Stephanie....THANK YOU for entering and accepting my challenge!! Where do I start...I guess first with my condolences for your Mom and your Brother. The song you chose was heartfelt and you sang it beautifully. It sounds silly but you not being able to finish it touched my heart and I am sure others as well. You sang it beautifully! Congratulations on your engagement and I wish you much happiness which you so richly deserve and I am sure all of that is coming your way. God bless you on a much happier road ahead!! 10/16/2007 06:54
Amazing. thank you so much, for responding so sincerely :) I loved this challenge, what a fantastic idea you've come up with for us all to share and get to know each other, to see what music is in our lives. Thanks for your well wishes and your condolences and your awesome comments. I am a blessed woman... i always seem to find things like Bix to float my lil heart-balloon higher. ty 10/16/2007 16:18
hmmm.. deftly moved by your comment just now. answering a bunch of sincere comments... but something about hearing "glad you're here" along with the rest of your comment felt so good. I actually do feel the love you're sending... i've felt a lot of love from people in their responses. I am a grateful child... (that last phrase just kinda came out so... i'll leave it.) ty 10/16/2007 16:31
We're so glad to have you a part of our Bix family....You have an amazing spirit about you...I see beauty. I see courage, I see perserverence. You are an amazingly talented girl! Blessings in all you do...Today, and every day
Hugs
Dana 10/15/2007 21:21
OH thank you so much... you've done a lot to make me feel welcome here, Dana :) ty so much. I'm pretty blesses in a weird kinda way.. but every blessing helps!! I feel so much warmth from you it's always sweet to see a comment from you. and indeed, Hugs back at ya;) 10/16/2007 16:27
Welcome to the BIX family. I Didn't know yu were on here. Thanks for sharing. For sure you get started talking and after playing back. It's like man I didn't plan to say all that. But it's a good thing to share who we are and what brought us to this place in our life. Music is so healing to the heart and those deepest feelings we carry with us day to day. So sorry for your loss. God's blessings for the new life to come. 10/15/2007 18:51
Thank you for the welcome, the wishes and the condolences. I feel very fortunate to be getting such a kind and supportive response from folks here is Bix-land. Music saves me all the time. Awesome to get your comments, thanks so much. 10/15/2007 20:04
Now, your singing, girl. You possess all the qualities that I love in a female voice. Strength, smoothness, deepness, feeling and great pitch. You are awesome and I look forward to your future entries! :) Thanks for the great video! 10/15/2007 18:22
Gawd, you are so sweet! I sense massive shifts in my confidence since getting involved with Bix. ty for being so .. so .. well.. dang it, you're sweet! 10/17/2007 08:02
I am sorry about your brother and your mom. It must be very difficult to lose them that way. I lost my younger sister to drugs. I also have a brother who is bi-polar and schzisophrenia. Mental illness is very difficult to deal with. I think you are an extremely brave and strong person and I give you kudos for sharing your life with us. 10/15/2007 18:21
Thanks for the kudos and condolences... I'm sorry for your loss as well. I'm learning that by sharing you find out a lot of people are having similar experiences in their lives. And that leads to the whole 'feeling less alone' thing.. which always helps. You've been very responsive to me here on Bix and i really thank you for that. You've really made me feel welcomed. 10/15/2007 20:16
being new was hard... but it let me make up a new personality every time we moved... keep trying 'myself' on until i found one i like ;) ... now that i'm always in one spot i always have to be one person :P 10/15/2007 20:11
you know.. quite frankly.. from watching some of your entries and reading your comments.. you seem like the kinda woman that enjoys 'racket makin' as much as i do... :D 10/15/2007 20:07
ty about the hair ;) i kept it very short most of my life for some reason.. now i want to be Rapunzel :P .. i don't think i'll be happy till it hits the floor.. lol. *and yes.. this 'stage fright' thing has got to go ;) * 10/15/2007 20:06
It was so great to hear about you and I'll start by saying that I'm so sorry about your loss's. That has to be so difficult for you but I sense from all you say there's within you a strong spirit, one of courage to move on. I don't pretend to have any answers,I haven't been in your situation but it can't hurt at all to do what you love and thats to sing,there's comfort here. I have been to your page and I really enjoyed what I heard. The inflections in your voice during the song are so great,very nice style. Your new here and I'm sure I welcomed you before, if not..Welcome to BIX. 10/15/2007 17:22
Oh, sir... you have welcomed me.. quite kindly too :D And there is comfort here in song.. and in a new sense of community for me. Thank you so much for your condolences and your amazing support of me since i hopped on this Bix. It's such a good feeling to know folks are enjoying listening to me sing and getting to know me a bit :) 10/15/2007 20:21
Holy moly! This was a challenge. Kinda more emotional than i hoped.. but it's interesting what comes out when you're asked to talk about yourself. (artist: Ane Brun)
